It can be hard to not find success and be unemployed for so long. It can feel hopeless. And still is being stuck in a job you hate sucks too.
Sound Familiar? Meet Luke
I’m going to talk about Luke. Luke was 36 years old when he came to me, and was in a job that was very unstable. He didn’t have the success he wanted. He was in project work, it was cyclical, and as a result of that they ended up laying off a good chunk of the company every 6 months.
Certainly now, in recent global times, more and more issues have tarnished our sacred mind space and we are beating ourselves up for not finding success.
In Luke’s case, on top of all of that, he had been told most of his life that he was lazy. Luke is diabetic and was overweight, didn’t have many friends, and was missing some basic life skills like budgeting, and house cleaning skills.
Initially when Luke came to me I couldn’t get him to focus on his career because he was so anxious about getting laid off all of the time. On top of that, he had been laid off so many times he was so defeated he couldn’t even think of applying for work.
What did we do?
Get Your Mind Right
The first thing we did with Luke was get his mind right. If your mindset is wrong it’s nearly impossible to get your mind right. You will not find success if your own inner critic is tearing you apart.
We used important tools to identify Luke’s cognitive distortions and reframe his thoughts and questions into possibility. We got Luke saying yes to himself. And, it wasn’t long before Luke was feeling “success minded”.
If you want some AMAZING tools on success mindset related to self-compassion, please check out. Dr. Kristin Neff’s work on self-compassion. You won’t regret it. It’s revolutionary in my humble opinion.
Stop The Ship From Sinking
The next thing we did was get him into a new stable position. At this stage it didn’t matter what it was. Let me explain why this is so important to just have “something” to do for work for your success.
Sometimes the ship we are on (unemployed, bad job, etc) is so far under water that we don’t feel like we can even catch our breath. So the best thing to do is to grab the first ship that sails by, get on that ship so that we can breathe again, so that we can catch our breath. Even if that ship is heading in the wrong direction, at least we can catch our breath again.
That’s exactly what we did with Luke. We got him a stable position so that he could breath again. It wasn’t an ideal job for Luke but it was a wonderful stop gap so that Luke could concentrate on doing better.
To do this I reached into my network and I connected Luk to a job. I can’t do this for all of my clients, but in this very rare circumstance the connection and the job were a fit. I do try to open doors for my clients success as often as I can.
Luke was a successful candidate that was interviewed by someone in my network. So because he could breathe again.
Start The Real Work Of Success
Once we had some breathing room we started to work on his ideal job fit rather than “just a job”, but unfortunately Luke wasn’t able to focus again. So we had to dig into every area of his life that he felt was problematic, and getting in the way of having a good life.
Of course, as a coach we often deal with the past because that’s not what coaching is about, coaching is about moving forward with success.
Needless to say, for Luke health and wellness came up, his social life came up, and cleanliness in his home came up, on top of that he had some work to do on his personal budget.
We worked on all of these things over the course of about 2 years, and in that time Luke significantly reduced his insulin intake, he also lost 80 pounds. This was as a result of the coaching but also setting Luke up with other practitioners, like personal trainers and nutritionist and a psychologist.
Luke started a savings account and he cleaned up his home, which by the way had close to 3 tons of garbage in it. And eventually he moved into a better home, once he got his old one cleaned up.
Finally Luke was ready for his ideal career, and with a tiny bit more coaching it all fell into place. Luke is now a personal trainer and he absolutely loves his job.
What’s the work you need to do? If you would like to have a discussion around Mindset & Focus Coaching please reach out to me.